I am still friends with my friend who blew off because of a guy on my birthday. I just am aware that men will always come first with her now. In actuality though, she was not with the eharmony guy on my birthday. Rather, she was upset because they were together for four days (they only just met on the first day) and during that time she met his parents, he told her he was in love with her, told her he wanted to marry her, and told her she should move to the middle east with him. But then apparently, he found out she helps her family financially and then decided if they got married that would be a problem so he lost interest. Then she met a new guy who also told her right away he wants to marry her and is in love with her and wanted her to be his girlfriend the second time they met.
I told my friend, I know that seems really romantic and exciting to you, but that is not normal. Getting that obsessive that early is a huge red flag. Someone who wants you meet his parents and marry him after only knowing you for four days is not normal. She meets normalish men sometimes who live in the actual same city as us, but she never is interested in them, she always wants people who live faraway and who want an intense relationship right away.
Dating/sex in New York City has always seemed very strange to me. I, and other have noticed that people either seem to want to use you for sex and throw you away like an empty can or dig their nails deeply into you and try to force you into some kind of dependent, suffocating relationship despite barely knowing you. My friend says it is because people try the first route and feel so alone and empty that they do a 360 and want to never be alone. I think both behaviors are pretty gross, but New York seems to be all about extremes.